Little Lu & Her Breath.

This is a spiritual lesson carrying two for the price of one. A place where my inner child, the girl from so long ago, would crack open in an unexpected way.

I have come to learn that some of the hardest things to share often turns into the golden threads weaved within our hearts inviting our soul to come home. 

Our spiritual lessons are for healing and our discomfort is the invitation.

This is a story that offered an opportunity to not only heal a little bit more with my inner child but also a lifelong battle with my breath.

This is a story that shares the understanding of why I chose Breathwork to bring into my toolbox. 

I am certain my best work comes from where I have once journeyed through and quite often, I still am. As a student of psychotherapy I came to realise my best work, the work that lights me up is from the space I personally and intimately am connected to. The inner work is my favourite place to mentor in. With Breathwork this was a part of not only my personal growth but also my spiritual growth.

This is why I do what I do. I want to be your spiritual running buddy and in order to do this I must bring light to the places I once felt lost in. I am here to guide others to step out into their path to wholeness. I am here to guide you through the dark into the light. Yes sometimes we must go back into the dark to find the light within. 

Breathwork was jammed into the forgotten caverns of my life, my denied salvation to becoming whole. The more I denied, the more it kept coming through.  

This is my story, my confession and my discomfort. 

Over the last month I felt it sting like a dirty little secret — when in truth it was a part of my becoming. Spirit whispered, “It’s Time.”

When I experienced my first breathwork journey, something deep inside me unlocked. It was like my inner voice was whispering, “This is a missing piece to our soul.”

I felt the call immediately — not from a place of ego, but from a place of deep service. A knowing that this was a gift meant to be part of my toolbox and in the mentorship I offer in Odyssey Lighthouse.

The Breath That Found Me

“And when I thought I had lost my voice, my breath became my beacon home.”

There are moments in life where something finds you — not just as a new experience, but as a soul remembrance. Breathwork was one of those moments for me.

At first, it looked like a modality, a tool, a healing technique.

But for me, it was more like a portal — a returning.

The Breath That Betrayed Me

As a child, my breath was never my friend. I remember struggling to breathe when emotions flooded in — fear, humiliation, sadness. I would hyperventilate when I cried. I’d hold my breath in moments of overwhelm, as if to disappear. I even hold my breath while I cook — just ask my kids.

And then there was the trauma — the moment at 11 years old during a playful breathing game in the school yard when everything went wrong. I was rushed to the hospital and my parents were not happy with me. I was in trouble. That moment became a locked memory in my body, one I didn’t fully understand until much later.

I carried that tension with me — in yoga teacher training, in spiritual work, even through my grown up tears. My breath always felt like something I had to conquer, not commune with.

But our bodies never forget. And neither do our souls.

The Journey That Brought It Back

Years later, during my first Ayahuasca journey, breathwork cracked something open in me. As I breathed, I was transported. Not just spiritually — but emotionally and organicly. I was taken back to that little girl. I was her. I saw the fear, the freezing, and the dissociation. I saw when my breath left me and I saw how I struggled to catch it. I witnessed my loop infused with my tears, my emotions and finally the humiliation of hyperventilating.

But this time, I didn’t leave her, this time, I breathed with her.

And that changed everything.

Breath became more than just air for me, it became a bridge. I started using it in my practices and at my events.

The Modality That Became My Medicine

When I recently experienced a new type of a breathwork at a retreat, I felt the pull to bring it into my own offerings. This 9D Breathwork merged both my hypnotherapy and my breathing. This Breathwork stopped me in my tracks. The energy, the movement, the emotion — I felt like my soul was whispering and then screaming, “Yes, This.” 

I reached out in hopes of connection and learning, but the timing wasn’t aligned — and so, I listened to my own inner guidance. I followed the path and trained directly with the source. I was wanting to complete my training before heading home to see my family. I knew even my family would be wanting to experience this. This was a modality I could not deny my clients or any other person in my circle. As a hypnotherapist/mentor I knew it was a game changer.

I soon became certified. And in doing so, I reclaimed something that was always mine:

The right to breathe freely, the right to feel deeply, and the right to guide others into their own liberation.

What came after wasn’t easy.

Unexpected emotions surfaced — Old wounds and stories of rejection, of not belonging. My inner child who already felt betrayed by her breath was being activated, but in a way I did not expect. These feelings were felt deeply.

But this time, I saw it not as a block, but as an initiation.

I could either shrink… or breathe even deeper.

So I chose my breath.

In truth — I almost silenced myself. I almost stayed small. I almost denied myself a purpose that I felt so connected to and so strongly in, a part of my life’s journey. This was not something I just thought of, it was something that healed my 11 year old and every other inner chapter of my childhood, and my adulthood. 

I soon realised, this wasn’t just resistance… it was an invitation.

The invitation was to either keep shrinking — or to exhale, and expand.

And I remembered, this isn’t just something I do, it’s something I am, and I don’t need permission to breathe anymore.

This is why I now offer 9D breathwork — not as an add-on, but as an anchor.

This has been my way home, a way through, a way in.

To the ones who have ever felt like breathing was too much, too hard, too unsafe…

I see you. I was you.

I created this space for us.

You’re allowed to take up space.

You’re allowed to be vulnerable.

You’re allowed to cry, to break open.

Most of all…..You’re allowed to breathe.

And I’ll be right here, breathing with you — one breath at a time.

I have come full circle in my breathing from that little girl hyperventilating in front of the world. Yes there have been times when my little girl I hold so dearly, still shows up.

This past year has been one of those times. You see, I arrived in a new place, a new life,and in a cast. There was a knowing I had a lot of healing to do and not just on a physcial level. Starting over in a place where I was not recognized for my truth or my history, would soon invite in the opportunty to do some deep inner spiritual work.

I have not always felt safe in this new life, and it has been difficult to explain who I am, how I feel and the depth of my heart. My inner child is active because this was alot of her life growing up. I lived with my heart on my sleeve and many had a difficult time understanding that.

Starting over is real and for me it has been a true spiritual journey, a gift. 

I miss my children, my family, friends and my community. Most of all I miss the me that felt safe and unafraid. I miss the me who didn’t have to prove her goodness first. The one who could walk into a space without her heart on guard. Who didn’t need to shrink to feel safe. Who was trusted simply because she existed and was real, “No masks, No defence — Just Me.”

It took a long time to get here and now I have found myself starting over in every sense of my being.

This is a spiritual experience I finally embraced just a few short weeks ago and I wish to share it with you. I am certain this may be a part of your story as well, just as it is mine.

Your softness is not a weakness. It’s your gift.

Your light is not a threat. It’s a mirror.

And yes, some people will look into that mirror and only see their own shadows. But that does not mean you are to blame.

You are not too much.

You are not unworthy of belonging.

You are not wrong for growing, healing, or following your calling.

You are simply walking a brave, heart-led path… in a world still learning how to love itself.

This Breathwork I loved every second.

I cried, I transformed, and I remembered.

This Breathwork held me as I healed a large piece of my heart, alongside my inner child.

Now, as I prepare to offer this to others — I’m moving through the tender edges of fear, old stories of not belonging, and even the pain of being misunderstood.

But I know this, our soul work is about truth. As healers and spiritual beings — we are stronger together. When questioned about who you are — you are someone who will shine your light so that others may find you or become aligned with the power that all can shine together. 

I didn’t choose breathwork to become someone else — I chose it to become more of myself.

And if it can do for others what it has done for me…

Then I know I’m on the right path.

With love and breath,

Patrice aka LuLu

⸻

Founder of Odyssey Lighthouse